Resident Evil 4: Different Standpoints
by someone-lost
Summary: Two female agents are deployed to retrieve a sample of the Las Plagas by an unknown organization. Although their methods are unorthodox they always get the job done, but will that change when they run into a certain handsome brunette and sexy Spaniard?
1. Treasure Hunting

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Resident Evil 4. All of that belongs to Capcom, sadly. Don't sue me!  
Author's Note: Hello and thank you for reading the first chapter of 'Resident Evil Four- Different Standpoints'. I'm sure that there are plenty of self insertion stories on but, frankly, I don't care. ^-^ This is something a friend and I are writing for fun. Please enjoy and leave behind any comments/ constructive criticism. I could definitely use the help. Thanks!

Some people think it's weird that I can sleep like a baby after shedding the blood of innocents or, helping people with less than noble causes on a daily basis. I say, 'What the hell. You only live once...' So why not make the best of it? Besides, their only looking at the negative aspects anyway. Let me list some of the positives:

*extensive travels to exotic locations

*freaking awesome pay

*situations that will teach valuable skills (like, sneaking into a high security secret lab in order to steal highly classified, if confusing, lab notes...)

* working with people a little out of the ordinary (I.e crazy megalomaniac assholes who want world domination…)

* an awesome job title (Come on! Not everyone can call themselves a Secret Agent with a straight face and mean it...)

See? That doesn't sound so bad, does it? Sure, I have a higher percentage of getting shot, dying in a fiery blaze, or breaking a nail, but in the end its all worth it.

Well, at least that's what I'm telling myself as we drive over yet another pothole and jump a foot in the air only to freefall back onto the hard seats of the old, beat up Toyota Camry.

"Fuck, I think my ass will be permanently molded in this stupid seat," Andrea grumbles.

"Yeah, well, it won't matter when we burn this bitch to the ground." I reply.

It doesn't help that the air conditioning is out and the CD player doesn't work either. For the past three hours we've been listening to nothing but static and whatever random words we can make out.

The folded map of Spain lies uselessly in my lap with words scrawled randomly and lines in various colors marked along potential trails. Since I can't read a map to save my life and I had been driving for the passed two days, it was Andrea's job to be both the map reader and driver for the remainder of the trip.

Which, seeing as our last pit stop was about half an hour ago, we should be reaching soon.

"Look, a bridge."

My focus switches from scratching at the scab on my finger to the dirt road up ahead and I see the bridge Andrea mentioned. Even from about thirty feet away I can see the rotting wood and less than stable looking rope barely holding it all together.

"Stop the car," I demand. We slow to a halt just a few feet away from the bridge and I untangle myself from the seat belt to stand outside. A slight wind blows unexpectedly and sends a chill throughout my body. Rubbing at my arms for heat, I stand at the start of the bridge and stare over the edge of the cliff.

Holy shit. It's a good three hundred feet fall before hitting what looks to be a shallow river. I take a step back and sigh.

"How is it?" Andrea asks, re-tying her dark, shoulder length hair into a tight pony tail.

"A long drop to hell." She scoffs and takes a peek over the edge. Her eyes widen.

"You weren't kidding."

"Would I kid about something as serious as our potential deaths?"

"Yes."

"… I don't know what to say to that."

"Hah, that's a first."

"Shut up."

Her fist lashes out and knocks me on top of the head. My open hand instantly slaps at her arm. Soon we're rolling around on the ground, leaves and fists flying. Her knee lands a particularly hard blow to my stomach as I yank relentlessly at her hair.

"Really, Francesca? Hair pulling?" she mutters between clenched teeth.

"Whatever gets the job done. Isn't that our motto?"

"Oh, shit, the job!" With one last slap at my butt she gets unsteadily to her feet and hobbles away towards the car. Still laying on the ground, I toss a small rock and watch it 'thunk' successfully against the back of her head.

"Hey!"

~-~-~

After one last tussle we clean ourselves up and ready our gear for a hike through the woods. I slip on a pair of black, finger less gloves and give myself one last look over in the compact mirror I brought.

Black hair falls in silky straight strands a bit below my shoulder blades and dark eyes lined with a thin layer of black kohl. My face is slightly round with a beauty mark on the right side, just beside my nose. I'm a bit on the short side, standing at a proud 4'11", but what I lack in height I make up with attitude.

For this mission I'm wearing a pair of black combat boots, tan colored skirt, and a form fitting black tee shirt. Not exactly reasonable now that I think about it, but its all I have left after driving endlessly for a week straight with almost no contact with more modern appliances. Hell, we were lucky the last motel we stayed at had a shower!

I strap a handgun to belt holster and a knife at my thigh. I absently brush off some dirt from my naturally tan arm and watch Andrea strap on a gun of her own. We're dressed similarly but instead of a skirt she's wearing a pair of shorts and shoulder holster.

Her pale face is flushed with the excitement of a new mission and, as our eyes meet, we share a grin.

"Let's go kick some ass!"

~-~-~

"Are we there yet?" I moan. The bridge was easy enough to cross, if a bit nerve shattering after Andrea's foot fell through one of the rotting boards, and it seemed as if the trail would never end. I can be patient for only so long…

Andrea sighs and pulls out a small PC like gadget. We had long ago abandoned the useless map and instead hooked up a satellite mapping program.

"Just about another mile or so," she informs. About ten minutes later we arrive at an old two story house with blood splatters all over the front yard.

"Well, this is a bit out of the ordinary, eh?"

"I wonder what could have caused this," Andrea mutters and kneels down to study the small puddles.

"I'll take a look in the house." I say and un-holster my gun. At her distracted nod I sprint for the house and silently push open the rickety door. I do a quick and quiet search of the first floor.

A large man lies face down in a pool of blood in what could be considered the kitchen. A series of bullet holes spread across his upper chest is obviously the cause of death. I roll him over and gasp as eyes filmed over with a thin milky layer stare at the ceiling. I take a few steps back and tap at the small ear piece in my right ear.

"I found a dead body on the first floor kitchen area. Bullet wounds cause of death. You might want to come check it out."

"Roger that. On my way." About a minute later Andrea shows up and does an examination of the body.

"This guy looks horrible," she mutters.

"Doesn't smell too good either," I joke. She smirks and digs a tiny camera from the small black bag on her back.

"Have you already checked the upstairs?" she asks, snapping a picture of the body.

"Not yet. Want to come with?" She nods and tucks the camera back into her bag. With me taking the lead we quickly ascend the stairs and secure the second floor. It doesn't take long because there is only one room which contains a lonely table and broken window.

"Looks like the window was broken from the inside. See how there isn't any glass on the floor? It's all on the outside…"

"But who would be crazy enough to jump through a window from the second floor?" I ask. Andrea shrugs.

We go back down stairs and leave the empty house, having no further reason to stay. The map shows a long trail leading to a small village so we continue to follow the path .

"Whatever killed that guy must still be around here," Andrea says. "We have to be careful…"

"Just what we need," I reply. "Some psycho going on a killing spree."

~-~-~

"Jesus Christ this door is heavy!" I puff out, sweat sliding down my face and legs aching. Somewhere, off in the distance, I can barely hear the ring of a bell.

"Again!" Andrea pants. "One, two, three!" Together we shove against the double iron doors with little success. This time the door budges a good two inches.

"This isn't working." I frown. "Time to change tactics."

After a good five minutes of discussion we finally settle on a way to get by the doors.

"Ready?" I ask, a large grin on my face. Andrea gives a double thumbs up and I pull the pin from the grenade in my hand. I toss it a good ten feet and it lands in front of the metal doors, exploding on contact.

We wait for the dust to settle before examining my handy work. The doors are successfully open, barely holding on by the blackened hinges. We happily walk through them.

"One of our best ideas yet." Andrea says brightly.

It doesn't take long for us to reach the deserted little village named 'Pueblo'. My fingers itch towards the gun strapped to my thigh, but settle for tapping at my waist.

"It's quiet," Andrea observes.

"Too quiet." We mutter together.

"Jinx! You owe me a soda!" Andrea shouts.

"Shit…"

Turns out the whole village is completely abandoned save for a random chicken here or there and a couple cows.

"Come 'ere, chicky chicky. Come to mama…" The red laser of my gun lands steadily on my prey's feathered body and just as I'm about to pull the trigger something lands with a 'thump' in front of me.

"What the hell…" It's a box of handgun ammo.

"That's your half!" Andrea shouts from the second floor of one of the houses. Her eyes are bright with discovery as she disappears from view. She's spent the last half hour wandering through every house looking for anything of use like food, ammo, or information on the Las Plagas sample we're supposed to retrieve.

Meanwhile I've been trying to shoot this damn chicken that keeps getting away from me. Damn chicken…

"Heads up!" Another box of ammo lands at my feet, this time it's shotgun. I stash it away in my brown back pack.

"Are you done yet?" I shout. "Yeah, I think I've found everything."

"I hope so. We've been here forever."

"I'm the only one whose done anything useful!"

"Nuh uh. I've done plenty of useful stuff while you played treasure hunter."

"Oh, yeah? Like what?" I bristle at the skepticism and cross my arms.

"Well, while you were collecting ammo for a gun we don't even have, I found out that the door with that weird insignia is locked."

"You Ding Dong, I'm the one who told you!"

"That's what I let you think."

"… That doesn't make any sense!"

"Exactly…" Amusement flashes in her eyes.

"Whatever. Let's go."

We skip the locked double doors and follow yet another dirt road that leads out of the village and into some sort farm area. A bunch of barns and more cows are spread around the land which look, oddly enough, to have been recently tended to.

"How odd. Where do you think everyone's gone?" Andrea asks, scanning the completely deserted area.

"Dunno. The local strip club?"

"Aren't you a bit late for your shift then?" She chuckles.

"Ha ha. I'm just dying of laughter. Don't you have some rocks to check under?"

"Touché. Actually, I think we'd just be wasting valuable time. Let's move on."

We follow the path on the right and wander through the double doors.

"You'd think that they'd pave some of these roads. All this dirt isn't good for-" A loud rumbling interrupts my rant and the earth shakes violently which knocks my balance off. As I fall I grab onto Andrea and take her down with me. We land in a pile of limbs and I can just catch a glimpse of what looks like a boulder before Andrea's foot smacks into my face.

"Damnit woman! Get off me!"

"You're the one who pulled me down!"

"Hey, if I'm going down I'm dragging you with me!"

"Then don't fucking complain!" We manage to untangle ourselves and get unsteadily to our feet. "What the fuck was that?!"

"I think it was a huge rock." I mutter angrily, poking a tender spot on my cheek. I hope it isn't bruised…

"Wha-" CRASH! What sounds like thunder echoes through the gray sky, causing both of us to jump at the unexpected noise.


	2. Meeting Leon

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Resident Evil 4. All of that belongs to Capcom, sadly. Don't sue me!

"Damn, we'll be lucky to make it through the day without a heart attack."

"Seems like it. Come on," Andrea grabs her gun and takes the lead. "Let's go check it out." We jog down the hill, guns at the ready, and through a mess of broken foliage lying on the ground. Rocks crunch under our boots and twigs snap sharply from our weight.

As we near the bottom of the hill Andrea comes to a sudden stop which causes me to bump roughly into her.

"What the hell-"

"Shh. Quiet." I take a peek around her just in time to see someone clad in a brown jacket and black pants head into a dark cave. With a quick glance at each other we hurry after the mystery man and, yes, it was a man. Or a very buff woman…

Ahem.

The cave, which was more of a tunnel, is dimly and muggy. Dirt keeps falling from the ceiling and into our hair which annoys the hell out of us.

"There better not be any bugs on me or, I swear to God, I'll light myself on fire." I moan. Andrea thwacks me on the back of my head.

"Even if there aren't any bugs I'm getting pretty tempted to set you on fire anyway."

"You joker. Your life would be one bleak incident from the next without me around to liven it up." I wiggle my eyebrows which I don't think she can see.

"Well, aren't you a bit full of yourself?"

"Only 'round you, darlin."

"A Southern accent doesn't suit you." I pretend not to hear that and change the subject.

"So, d'you think that person was a man, or a woman?"

"I think you need to get your eyes checked if you think that could be a woman."

"Why? Because of the body build? Tsk, tsk, Andrea. One time, in Vegas, this person who I _thought _was a cute guy hit on me and-" A series of gunshots ring out and yells echo in the tiny tunnel causing our ears to ring for a moment before we spring into action. We sprint the last few yards to the exit and emerge into what looks like a war zone. A friggin' axe flies by my head, missing by just a few inches, and I feel the blood drain from my face.

Andrea fires at the person who threw it, a woman wearing an ugly blue dress and dirty white apron. If it wasn't for the blood beginning to leak from the wound, I would say that it didn't even affect her. Another shot, this time to the leg, brings her down to her knee for a moment, but then she's back up and wielding another axe.

The woman shouts something in Spanish and rears back for the throw. Metal against metal; the axe flies from the villager's hand and she looks accusingly to our left. The same man we saw enter the tunnel stands there with a gun in his hand and a deadly look in his ocean blue eyes. A gorgeous example of the male species standing only a few feet away.

" Stand back," he commands in a rough voice that makes my heart thump and toes curl. We nod dumbly and watch as he runs up and delivers a swift kick to the woman's stomach. She stumbles back, a grunt leaving her lips, before the man shoots her once in the head.

"Oh my God." I'm not sure which of us says it out loud, but I know damn well it's what we were both thinking.

"We can't stay here," the man says and motions for us to follow him. "Let's get inside that house."

I fall into step behind Andrea and the sex God as we make a run for a creepy looking house. Providing a bit of cover fire, mystery man and I cover Andrea as she tries to break the lock on the front door.

"Just kick it down!" I shout, punching a man who gets a bit too close for comfort.

"Fuck that!" BAM! BAM! The lock falls in pieces to the floor and we pile through. I slide the dead bolt into place and we take a moment to catch our breaths before the interrogation begins.

"Who are you?"

"Will you sleep with me?" Two startled gazes swing my way and I turn red. Fighting the blush, I grin cockily and take Leon's hands in my own. I stare into his eyes and rub a hand up his arm. "Come on, big boy." I purr. "Take a walk on the wild side with me." Wink.

"Get over here and keep your hands to yourself. Sorry," she says to the man. "She isn't house broken." The man smiles slightly, the shock obviously worn off, and runs a hand through short brown strands of hair.

"No problem," he chuckles. "Happens often." Really? Two pairs of eyebrows rise and as soon as a lecherous grin appears on my face Andrea's hand pinches my arm.

"Knock it off and _try_ to act professionally," she orders. Fine. But it can't keep me from _imagining _it. I sigh contentedly as dirty images fly through my mind. Oh, yeah! Let the slide show begin.

"So who are you? Obviously not tourists from the way your dressed and the weapons your carrying."

"No we're not and that's all your going to know. I'm Andrea and this midget is Francesca. Who are you?"

"Hey!"

"The name's Leon. I'm a government agent looking for the President's daughter. Have you seen her?" He digs through one of his pockets and pulls out a snap shot of a young girl with blonde hair and muddy eyes.

"She has big ears." I state, pointing. "And a creepy smile." Leon coughs.

"Have you seen her?"

"No we haven't."

"You're sure." Leon presses. Andrea crosses her arms and gives him an annoyed look.

"Yes, I'm sure. We haven't run into anyone other than those crazed villagers for hours."

"What the hell are those guys smoking anyway? Even a horse would have been down after three shots…"

"I'm not sure," Leon says and frowns. "But I have to find Ashley before something happens to her."

"Yeah, I don't think you'd get paid very much for bringing her in dead," Andrea smirks.

"This wasn't really a 'bring her back dead or alive' mission." Leon admits. "I might as well move to Africa if I can't find her in time."

"Then how about we help you?" Andrea suggests. Leon looks to actually be considering it when I grab her by the arm and give an innocent smile.

"Excuse us, I need to talk with my partner for a minute." We huddle in a far corner of the room as Leon paces in front of the door. "What the hell are you thinking?! Now isn't the time to be thinking with your vagina, damnit!"

"Says the biggest pervert on Earth." She retorts and rips her arm from me. "Think about it, dummy. We can use him to help us find the sample."

"No, we're just going to get our cover blown. He's already suspicious and I have a feeling he isn't someone who trusts easily."

"You saw the look in his eyes, someone might as well paint 'superman' on his chest. I can guarantee you that even if we don't, he'll demand that we stick together. Besides, you saw those… things." I grimace as their lifeless eyes and frightening faces flash through my mind. "We don't know what we're up against," she continues. "Our chances will increase if _we_ also increase our numbers."

"You're right," I sigh and look to the floor. "As much as I don't like it we're stumbling in the dark and, even if he doesn't know what's going on either, muscle man doesn't seem incompetent."

Andrea smiles smugly and glances at Leon.

"I'm glad you see things my way. Now let's get going. The sooner this is over the sooner we get our paychecks and start our vacation."

"I don't know. I think I might stay here; all this thirst for blood reminds me of my mom."

"Loser…"

~-~-~

"Okay, let's go. Alliance formed. Let's kick the bad guy's butts and all that good stuff."

"Wait a minute. You guys still haven't explained why you're here."

"Why do you want to know? Isn't it enough that we're going to help your ass?" I huff.

"Let's just say that we're looking for something too." Andrea intervenes and sends a pleading look to Leon.

"And you can't tell me what it is."

"Nope so, now that we understand each other, let's get going already. I'm feeling antsy." With out waiting for a response I continue into the next hallway, intent on searching for a back exit, but stop short at the thin, black wire running from one wall to the other. Its hooked up to a small explosive. "Might want to duck under the wire." I call over my shoulder and crawl underneath it.

"If that skirt were another inch shorter," Andrea mutters and follows. The next room isn't much better than the last and only contains a table and tall armoire.

"Do you hear that?" Leon asks, blue eyes scanning the room's walls. We all stay quiet for a few moments.

Thump… Thump… Thump…

"Huh. Anyone else getting a bit turned on?" Blank stares. "Thought not."

"It's coming from over here," Leon says and turns to study the armoire. "There's something behind here." He wanders to the left side of it and shoves his shoulder against the wood. In three shoves he completely unblocks the doorway.

Guns drawn we pile in one by one into the virtually empty room. Another armoire is shoved in the corner, but this time it's rocking back and forth. Muffled shouts are coming from it and Leon moves to open it with Andrea taking point opposite him. They glance at each other; Leon undoes the lock and something falls from the cabinet's hollow compartment. Or, rather, someone.

Wearing a strange cowboy like outfit complete with brown boots, a man with chocolate brown hair sits before us. Frightened chestnut colored eyes meet my own and I immediately fall in lust…


	3. Thanksgiving Special

All four of us sit in some random house back at the main village. I'm sitting in one of several chairs placed around a long, moss ridden table. Andrea is busy starring at Leon trying with whatever mind power she has to make him look at her while he is busy talking with the Spaniard we found in that closet. How we ended up back here is a mystery.

A small bell rings throughout the house causing all conversation to stop and three pairs of eyes shoot towards the brunette to my left. Andrea jumps at the sudden attention, but focuses on digging through her bag once she realizes the reason why. Glancing at her phone for a moment she smiles slightly before shoving it back inside the leather bag.

"It's Thanksgiving," she proudly states. My stomach grumbles from lack of food. When the fuck did I last eat? Let's see, there was the candy bar in the car, but that was, like, a couple hours ago.

"Hell of a Thanksgiving…" Luis says.

"You can quit the accent thing. We're not on screen moron." Dark brown eyes meet my own as a slow smile crosses his face.

"Would you like to say that again, senorita?" His hand wanders to the butt of his gun, one finger slowly teasing the holster.

"Bring it!"

"Hold it! Jeez, what the fuck is your problem?" Andrea intervenes with one hand pressed firmly against our chests.

"Sorry, all the sexual tension has to go somewhere." I shrug.

"But you haven't even known each other for three seconds!"

"Well, we haven't known each other 'on screen' for three seconds, but all the _real _magic happens backstage."

"You don't have a problem with the accent _then_," Luis grins. "Okay, that's enough. God." My friend visibly shudders. "I really don't want to know what perverted games you guys play off screen so, please don't paint me any pictures."

"Just because she isn't getting any from Leon," I whisper to Luis.

"I heard that!"

"What the hell are you guys doing???"

"Really, Leon? Three question marks? Was that really necessary?"

"You just did it," he points out. I go back and count them.

"Yeah, but they aren't all in a row like your dramatic ass."

"Francesca! Stop trying to start fights! Leon, stop being dramatic! God, this is worse than babysitting…" Andrea settles back into her place at the table, shoulders slumped. Leon gently the hair away from his eyes. The rest of us take a seat and several minutes of silence passes.

"What were we talking about?"

"You mean Andrea trying to get boned by Leon?" Luis asks helpfully while Andrea stays mercifully silent.

"No, not that. We'll discuss that further later. I meant, before all this craziness happened."

"Why it can't be Thanksgiving!" Andrea shrieks.

"And I called _Leon _dramatic."

"Huh. Why _can't___it be Thanksgiving?" Leon regards Luis with an 'are you shitting me?' expression.

"Because it's not November."

"Yes it is."

"No, it isn't."

"_Yes_ it is!"

"I think I would know! I _am_ the main character aren't I?"

"Only in the video game, pretty boy! The story is _our_ show!"

"Oh? Are you so sure about that? I thought your acting earlier was pretty lacking. I bet we could nab Angelina in a heartbeat."

"Hah. Good one. I'll remember that the next time I have to save your ass!"

"Please! You couldn't hit the side of a twenty story building if you tried! All that CIA training down the drain…" Someone let out a gasp.

"Oh, no he didn't." Luis mutters, backing up in fear.

"What the fuck did you say?!"

"You heard me! Or were you too busy staring at Luis' ass?"

"Your just jealous because I'd rather stare at his than yours!"

"Jealous?!" he roars. "I'll have you know that I have more fan girls than you can count! I can't walk down the street without a horde of girls screaming my name!"

"You know, your acting very out of character right now even for your normal dramatic manner. What will the fan girls think?" He blinks and the look of absolute shock on his face is priceless.

"You-You-" Leon stutters. Andrea comes to grab the poor man by his shoulders and steers him into a chair.

"There, there now. See what I have to live with every day?"

"She is the most infuriating woman on Earth," Leon replies shakily.

It takes a few minutes for everyone to calm down something Leon has a bit of trouble with as Luis is busy laughing his ass off and gasping between breaths, "Burn!"

"…You know, those chickens are starting to look pretty good right about now." I say. Everyone turns to look out the window to look at the chickens wandering aimlessly around the dirt yard. Each one has dirt crusted on their feathers and probably smell just as bad as they look. Andrea crinkles up her nose in disgust.

"You can't be serious."

"Dead."

"Then let's catch one." Luis raises an eyebrow at Leon's suggestion."You sure about that hombre? They don't look very… hygienic."

"I'm starving. I can only live off of granola bars and bottled water for so long."

"It's only been a couple hours." Andrea grumbles.

"Okay then," I smirk. "But let's make this a bit interesting. A competition of sorts."

"I'm listening." Leon replies, staring at me with mischievous blue eyes.

"Whoever can capture a chicken wins. Catch is that only guns can be used. Whoever loses will admit they're stupid and can't shoot for shit."

"You're on!"

Two minutes later.

"I'm a stupid asshole who can't shoot for shit. I worship the ground that Leon S. Kennedy, a bigger asshole, walks on and wish that he would fuck me into next Thursday."

"Nice. Could use some work, maybe hint at a bit of my loving personality and body hard as steel, but it's passable."

"Bite me." I grind out between clenched teeth.

"Uh uh uh! That wasn't in the agreement."

"Neither was that other stupid stuff!"

"What's a game without some dignity lost?"

"Fuck. You."

Leon sighs and pulls a stray leaf from my hair.

"How you dream."

The contest was pathetically short and extremely dirty. Well, at least for me. My plan was to tackle a chicken and put a bullet in it's head. Problem was I had to dive onto the ground to do so. And those fuckers can run incredibly fast. And are really, really agile. Another problem was that I didn't specify _which_ gun could be used so, Leon had cornered a chicken and pumped it full of lead from a shotgun.

Making him the winner. Asshole.

And now we have a chicken we can't even eat.

Happy fucking Thanksgiving.


	4. Enter Luis Sera

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Resident Evil 4. All of that belongs to Capcom, sadly. Don't sue me!

I should probably tell you now that I act like a complete moron around hot people. I mean, I act like a moron all the time, but put someone even remotely cute in my line of vision and my 'act like a dumb shit' meter sky rockets. So, naturally, the first thing I do when a hot cowboy lands practically at my shoes is drop my handgun (which is heavy as hell and accidentally lands on the poor guy) and blush ten shades of red. Heh. At least now he's stopped moving. Oh… Is that blood?

"Shit."

Andrea bursts out laughing, tears gathering in her eyes, and leans against the dresser. "S-Smooth," she gasps and clutches at her sides. Leon's eyes wander from Andrea to me and then the guy on the floor with confusion.

"Oh, crap! I'm sorry!" I grab the gun from the floor and holster it before gently probing the bruise colored bump on the cowboy's forehead. The man flinches and stares at me with a dazed expression due to the concussion I undoubtedly gave him. Damn.

The man tries to speak can't because of the tape covering his mouth. Without thinking I rip it off and toss it away.

"A little rough don't you think?"

"But I like it rough." A second of silence passes and the man's grin slowly widens.

"I like you," he states which sends another wave of heat to my face. Leon rolls his eyes and rolls the man onto his stomach. "You're not like them?" The two men share a look.

"No," Leon finally answers. "You?" The man rolls away and rubs at his sore wrists.

"Okay, I've just got one very important question: You got a smoke?"

"Got gum," Leon answers and Andrea shrugs. I just shake my head. The man sighs and opens his mouth to say something before the door bursts open and two villagers spill in. A giant man in a worn out trench coat ambles in after them. He has a shaved head, black beard, and cruel eyes.

"Perfect. The big cheese," the cowboy mutters.

"You need to lay off whatever the hell it is your eating, buddy." Jeez. Does my brain _ever_ work? This guy looks like he could break me in half and use my bones as tooth picks if he wanted! Andrea gives me a look, gun already aimed and is about to fire off a shot when Leon runs up and gives the giant a spinning back kick. Leon's foot is caught, however, and he's thrown with little effort into the Spaniard still on the floor. Both men crash into the wooden cabinet behind them. It breaks and both men remain on the floor, knocked unconscious.

"Guess it's up to us!" With a flick of my wrist I throw a knife at the giant that he dodges easily, but what he doesn't expect is the handgun now pressed firmly into his coat. "Gotcha," I smirk and pull the trigger. Round after round is injected into his body, blood begins to soak through his coat, and I'm just five shots in when a beefy hand clamps around my neck and lifts me from the ground. Black dots dance in front of my eyes, the gun falls from my fingers as I scratch at his hand. As the seconds pass and my strength starts to fail everything begins to grow dim.

The last thing I hear is Andrea shouting my name.

My head hurts, my neck is sore, and all I can think about is how much I screwed up. I should've kept my distance instead of thinking I could take on that brute in such close range. Even better, I should've taken out the two goons before heading straight for the boss. Well, at least I didn't try and use hand-to-hand combat like that idiot Leon. Andrea's probably the only one who thought with her head…

The buzzing in my ears is dying down, thank God, but when I try to open my eyes its like lifting a pound of lead. Maybe I'll just rest a bit more…

"-good for a guess. Want to start explaining?" Is that Leon?

"Psychic powers. Nah, just kidding with you amigo. I over heard one of the villagers talking something about the President's daughter in the church." Church? What the hell would she be doing there? Not my problem, I remind myself. My only concern should be the sample.

"And who might you be?"

"Me llamo Luis Sera. I used to be a cop in Madrid. Now I'm just a good for nothing guy, who happens to be quite the ladies' man." I'll bet. If his looks didn't get the girls then his accent sure as hell would. Luis Sera. Kinda rolls off the tongue, doesn't it? Oops, I'm missing the conversation. I wonder where Andrea is…

"I think I might have seen a sample of the virus in the lab at my department." WHAT?! Just as I manage to crack open an eye the door bursts open and a shadow walks in with something dragging behind him. My vision is blurry, but I can hear the distinct sound of metal on rock.

"Do something cop!" Luis shouts.

"After you!" Leon grunts. By now my eye sight is pretty clear and I wish like hell it wasn't. Leon and Luis are tied up together in the middle of the room and a villager is standing with an axe above his head, ready to slice them down the middle. Which, actually, isn't too bad of an idea since their ties are conveniently located at their wrists…

Leon must've had the same thought because just as the axe is coming down he shouts, "Now!" and both men pull away just in time for the axe to slice cleanly through the rope. Free from restraints, Leon delivers a swift kick at the villager that knocks him off his feet and into the wall behind him. He breaks his neck and lands with a 'thud' on the floor beside a comatose Andrea. The smirk on my face fades as I watch Luis scramble to his feet and make a run for the door, his eyes meet my own for a moment before he disappears from sight.

"…" Mother fucker.

"Francesca, you're awake?"

"That asshole!" I shriek, startling the poor brunette. "Can you believe him? First you save his ass and then he runs off with his tail between his freakin' legs without so much as a thank you!" Ugh! Our wedding is so off. Leon sighs before grabbing his knife and working on my own restraints. In moments they're off and I'm free to get the blood moving back in my hands again. The pain is almost laughable compared to the injury on my neck. I can only imagine how it looks.

Andrea is still unconscious and seems to have some major bruising on her side and legs. She didn't go down easy.

"Woo hoo! Earth to Andrea, come in Andrea!" She isn't responsive which worries me. I feel her pulse and to my relief its still steady and strong.

"She's probably just wiped out," Leon says fresh off his communicator with someone named Hunnigan. I heard only snippets of their conversation, opting to concentrate more on my friend than his heroic mission to save the Prez's daughter; I could care less about that blond. I took a moment to weigh the possible options.

One would be for Leon to take a hike, find Graham, and when he comes back we're long gone looking for the Plagas sample. I can already see him start to get antsy; looking out the window and probably wondering how much time we're already wasting sitting here with our thumbs up our asses waiting for Andrea to wake up which, knowing her, would probably take another hour.

On the other hand, Leon could stay and wait and we'd all leave together like a big freaking happy family to find Graham who, by the way, is probably in hysterics from being trapped in less than hygienic conditions. Then we'd have to lug them both all the way to retrieve the sample, suffer through their endless amount of questions about what we're _really _doing out here. Yeah, _no thanks!_

"Why don't you go on ahead?" Leon gives me a sharp look and shakes his head.

"No way."

"Why not?" I can't stop the whine in my voice.

"I'm not leaving you two alone with whatever is out here."

"Look, every second you sit here with Sleeping Beauty and me is another second that could be spent looking for the President's Daughter. Now, I'm no super villain or anything, but if I was whoever was running this show and I found out that a government agent was after her ass I'd move her somewhere else pronto." I can see him considering the options, weighing the pros and cons of my logic. So, I give him another push. "Look, I promise we won't move a muscle. We'll wait right here for you to come back after you've saved the day, kay? I'm not so fucking crazy that I'd want to face that, that _thing_ again without some more back up and a whole arsenal of guns." The very real quiver in my voice at facing that creature must set something off in him, add some truth to my story, because his face softens and he once again looks out the window.

"Fine," he agrees after some time. "I'll leave, but I expect you two to be right where I leave you and I want you to barricade the door when I leave."

"Roger that, Captain!"

"What's your frequency?"

"What?"

"Your frequency. On the radio."

"Oh, heh. I thought that might have been some weird pick up line, like, 'what's your sign baby?'" Leon gives me an odd look, one I'm pretty much used to by now, and I rattle off a number which he inputs into his communicator.

"Okay, I'll contact you when I find Ashley. You can reach me at this number if trouble comes." I put his number into my radio. "Come here."

"What?"

"Come over here." He repeats. Huh. He must have the patience of a saint to not have yelled at me yet. I walk over to him, still a bit unsteady on my feet, but manageable. He reaches down to my height and my heart quickens as he runs gentle fingers over my neck. I finch as he probes a particularly painful bruise. "I was saving this for something else, but here." He reaches around behind him and produces a white can from what seems to be thin air.

"What the hell is that?"

"A first aid spray."

"Dude, it actually has 'First Aid' written on it. With a green cross."

"Yeah. It works really well. Here, let me spray it on you."

"Heh. I always knew you were a pervert." Leon just smirks and sprays a liberal amount of the first aid spray onto my neck. It burns like hell for a few seconds before an intense cool takes over. In moments it feels like the wound isn't even there.

"It'll take about an hour before it's completely healed, but it should numb the pain almost immediately."

"You're right," I sigh with relief. "I can't even feel it." Leon nods and hands me the remainder of the spray.

"Use the rest on Andrea."

"Will do!"

"I'm going to go then. Make sure you stay right here, okay? Radio me if something happens."

"I'm not a kid, Leon, but thanks for the concern. I'm pretty sure I can take care of an unconscious woman for a couple hours."

"I certainly hope so. Just be careful."

"Yeah, you too." With one last look at my unconscious friend he leaves. A good ten minutes passes before I start to get bored and decide to check out the surrounding area. I have to make sure we're not surrounded by villagers with their 'super advanced' weaponry, right? So I quickly grab my gun, which was miraculously holstered in the appropriate spot, and head out. It wouldn't hurt to leave Andrea alone for a few minutes… right?


	5. Stranga, Stranga!

I don't get far before one of the strangest things to ever happen to me occurs.

"Over 'ere, Stranga." A hunchbacked man appears dressed in a large black rain jacket and purple scarf wrapped around the lower portion of his face just as I'm leaving the building. He wanders away, around the side, and disappears. Gun ready I follow him with cautious steps and senses on high alert. Yet, when I find him, he's alone and immediately opens his jacket to reveal a seemingly endless supply of guns and ammo strapped to his body.

"Holy shit!"

"Hehehe, what're you buying, stranga?" Everything… My eyes are glued to his chest or, more specifically, the lovely TMP strapped to it. And the rifle, oh God, I want a rifle!

"How much for those?" I ask, pointing to both weapons. The man laughs.

"Eager aren't cha? It's 15,000 for the TMP and 12,000 for the Bolt-Action Rifle. But, for you, I'll settle for 25,000 for both."

"Is this in American dollars or…?" The merchant spat on the ground.

"What good would that do me 'ere? I need cold hard Pesetas."

"Andrea would kill me if I spent that much money on guns…" I mutter, eyeing them with desire. But, it's not like she's awake to yell at me or anything, right? And we DO need to better equip ourselves for whatever might be ahead of us. "I'll take it!"

"Hehe, come back anytime." We exchange items, coins for guns, and I settle down beside him to double check their condition. Can never be too careful, ya know? Once I'm satisfied that everything is in good shape I dust myself off, strap the new guns to my sides, and wander around the house some more. There are double doors that lead out into some kind of complex, gunfire and shouts come from behind them and I'm more than a little tempted to find out what is causing all the commotion. Loyalty overrides my curiosity, but just barely. If Andrea doesn't wake up in ten minutes I'll go have a check. No reason for both of us to remain useless…

I use the other half of the spray that Leon had given me on her side and legs. I toss the can in some corner and then pace around the room for a bit. Once the ten minute mark passes and Andrea is still asleep I grab my new rifle and head out for some adventure. Just a quick peek at the complex to make sure there aren't any immediate threats, I rationalize. Before I leave, though, I hunt down the merchant.

"Excuse me."

"Welcome!" He throws open his jacket and for one terrifying moment I wonder if he's naked. That would so not do too well for my stomach. Too my relief its just to show off the same guns and ammo. "What're you buyin'?"

"I'm not buying anything. Look, my friend is in that house over there and I'm just going to leave for a few minutes so could you keep an eye out for her? You know, make sure no one drags her off to rape and/or murder her? I would really appreciate it." And so would she…

The merchant gives me an appraising look before shrugging.  
"Um, is that a 'yes'?" He just stares at me. "Okay, then. I'll be back in a few."

"Come back any time!" He calls after me. Yeah, okay, weirdo. I shrug off any guilt at leaving my best friend in the hands of some gun carrying wacko and happily waltz through the double wooden doors. The gunfire and shouts I had heard earlier are but a bittersweet memory because all is silent as I wander through the maze of houses that make up the complex. The entire structure is huge and winding with unstable bridges and wooden planks that serve as walkways between each one. Except for finding some herbs and a box or two of handgun ammo its practically stripped bare of anything useful.

I had run into another set of doors at the far opposite end of the complex, but I'm not going to go through those just yet. Instead I retrace my steps and check back in on Andrea. She's still pretty out of it and doesn't look like she'll wake up anytime soon. I plop down onto the floor beside her and dig through my backpack for my compact, flipping it open I take a quick peek at my neck then wish I hadn't. The inflammation is going away, but the bruising still looks like a nightmare. At least its still a bit numb… I slam the compact close and concentrate on brushing the twigs and dirt from my hair. Gotta look presentable when I kick Luis' ass… Heh, who says I don't have priorities? Deeming myself 'presentable' takes another few minutes but when I'm done I hardly look like I've been prancing through the forest. Laura Croft I am not, but it'll do until I can find a decent restroom.

Andrea still isn't awake and my patience is running thin.

"Better wake up before I leave you behind," I mutter and give her a poke. She doesn't stir. A few more seconds pass before I get to my feet and head for the door. I slam it shut, pause for a moment just in case she woke up, and continue on when it seems she hasn't. I track down the merchant again which isn't hard because he's standing exactly where I had left him earlier. "I'm going to leave again," I tell him. "Please look after Andrea again." He just stares at me and figuring that's the best I'm going to get for a 'yes', I nod and head through the double doors again.

I sprint for the doors I have yet to go through, deciding not to waste any more time. The door opens smoothly and it takes a couple of seconds for my eyes to adjust to the suddenly dim lighting. Dirt crunches under my feet as I take a few hesitant steps forward, my eyes roaming along the wooden crates shoved up against the walls and bare bulb hanging from the ceiling. Someone needs to hire an interior decorator…

I explore the rest of the hallway, pass by some broken windows and straight into an ambush. Three demented villagers are standing at the far end of the room; one holding a torch and the other two wielding axes. They haven't seen me yet which gives me a much needed advantage. I switch to the Rifle and take aim at the man standing closest to me, one of two with an axe, and fire what I hope is a head shot. Luckily my aim is true and his head bursts open, spraying blood and brain matter across the wall.

The sight is grotesque and makes my stomach roll, but I don't have much more time to think about it because the two remaining men start to charge in my direction. I switch guns again to the TMP and once their just a few feet away I unload a round of bullets into their bodies. To my relief they go down in seconds, the last one falling to his knees less than a foot away. I dodge his falling body and continue on.

Bear traps are placed randomly around the remainder of the area, some already activated and others just waiting with open jaws for someone to be their next victim. After investigating the activated ones I'm surprisingly relieved that none of them have blood or flesh on their claws. Leon and I have only exchanged a handful of sentences to each other, yet I don't wish the man any harm in his ambitious plan to save the President's daughter which is puzzling. Maybe it's because he's hot and has a sexy voice…

I shrug off my wandering thoughts and exit the room only to emerge into a hallway. Chills run up my spine as the sudden cold assaults my body. Rubbing my arms for warmth, I jog cautiously down the path and stop as the hallway opens into a wider cave. A ladder leads down from the metal walkway and into a pool of water some twenty feet down. I lean over the edge of the railing, gun held loosely in my hand, and peer into the murky water. Is that…?

Something is sparkling beneath the surface, just beckoning me to jump in and get it. A short debate starts in my head as to whether or not to grab it. Sadly there are more cons than pros. One of the cons is that I don't know how deep the water is and I can't swim very well. The second is that anything could be down there: slimy fish, poisonous bugs, or even crocodiles. Just the thought of being chomped in half by a crocodile makes me want to faint. On the other hand, it wouldn't sparkle if it wasn't important… right? My curiosity overrides common sense, again, and any thoughts of the danger that could be waiting. I drop my bag on the floor and carefully lower myself over the edge to climb down the ladder. The rungs are cold to the touch, almost painfully so, but I continue on until I reach the gross looking water.

I dip one foot in, clinging to the ladder like a lifesaver, and find that the water is equally cold. Fuuuck. The shiny isn't that far away, though, so I suck it up and slowly lower the rest of my body in. Its deep enough that my shoulders cut through the water. After a few steps my foot runs into something hard on the ground and without thinking I take a deep breath and dive under. My hands skim the surface floor without success. It takes multiple tries before I finally grasp it and splash back up.

What feels like a rock rests in my clenched hand while I catch my breath and upon opening my hand it looks like one too except for the fact that it's a bright pink color and transparent as glass. Having done a bit of research about the area (really just skimming the thick packet Andrea had given me) I remember that this is called a Spinel, a rare type of jewel that can be found here. This could easily net me a thousand Pesetas. Grinning like a fool, I stuff the rock in my skirt pocket, and ascend the ladder with ease.

When I reach the top I shove the Spinel in one of my pack's pockets and shake out some of the water in my hair. Another ladder waits for me, the only other way out of this cave-like structure, so I climb that too after shouldering my backpack and enter the open air once again. More trees and rocks line a pathway that leads up to a dreary looking two story house. Passing the two activated bear traps I jog up to the house, ascend the stairs, and quickly sweep the area for any dangers.

There's only a door which is locked, a glowing insignia smack dab in the middle of it. Running my hand over the smooth glass, it actually changes direction along with it. Huh. Up, down, left, right, the ball moves effortlessly beneath my touch and transforms the figure depending on the direction. It must be some kind of puzzle. Damn, I'm absolute crap at puzzles. Sighing, I mess with the ball a bit before letting out a shriek of frustration.

I run the ball down, down, and then right with little hope of success. Bingo! The soft 'click' sound is like music to my ears and I waste no time in rushing through the now open door. Before it manages to completely open though, I notice that the insignia is now upside down from what it originally was. A ball of dread forms in my stomach though as the door slams shut just as I pass through and releases another 'click', the door is probably locked now. After a few unsuccessful attempts at shoving and pulling I have no doubts left in my mind. Shit. Andrea isn't going to be too happy…

Oh, well. Can't change what has already happened, right? Pushing the thought of a pissed off Andrea to the back of my mind, I look around the room with the hopes of some kind of distraction. No such luck. It's just another bedroom, this one, though, has a broken window. I frown and examine the glass beneath it. There isn't a lot which means that whoever/whatever did it did it from the inside out. Could Leon have dived through the window? No, I definitely would have seen him on my way up. So, what the hell? I could spend all day trying to figure out what the fuck is going on in this crazy place, but I don't think I'd find much. Either way, my only concern should be the sample.

I search the room which is crowded with a large bed, wooden cabinet, desk, and bookshelf. There's a box of handgun bullets in the desk, but that's about it. Most of the book titles on the shelf are in another language or, have weird titles that seem too technical to understand. If Andrea were here, I'm sure she'd be able to decipher them since she actually paid attention to the science classes we'd taken last fall. I toss the heavy book I had been leafing through on the bed and exit the room. Except for finding some guy in the John there isn't anything exciting or useful in the house. Pocketing a couple hundred Pesetas, I leave the house with a sigh. I have to find Luis and talk him into giving me the sample's definite whereabouts. Where the hell could he have gone?

My head is so far into the clouds that I don't immediately see the man standing a couple yards away until the sound of a lawnmower breaks through the silence. Two things run through my mind as a chainsaw wielding maniac comes running towards me: One, why the fuck is he wearing a potato sack on his head? And two, HELP!


	6. Promises Made To Ashley Graham

**I don't own Resident Evil 4 or Wal-Mart. **

**

* * *

**

There are a lot of things that I'm afraid of like roaches, snakes and my mother but I've learned to deal with each in my own way. For instance, I call Andrea to deal with the roaches and snakes while a bottle of vodka and a well placed comment about sexism in society will usually take care of my mother. But chainsaw guys… I can't say that I've ever run across that particular fear other than in the comfort of my hotel room behind the confines of a TV screen.

So, when I see this flesh and blood man heading towards me at full speed its like all of my fears combined in one. I can't seem to pull enough air into my lungs, my feet are frozen to the ground and it feels like my entire body has been doused in cold water. I have looked down the barrel of a gun and into the eyes of murderers before but just the thought of having that terrifying blade pressed into my flesh sends little black dots dancing in front of my eyes.

And ya know, the funny thing about fainting is that there isn't a whole lot of warning before it happens. Sure there's the little black dots and that feeling that something really fucking wrong is about to happen, but that really doesn't take anything more than a few seconds. It's kind of like falling asleep; one moment I'm awake, thinking about that cute guy in the next room and then BAM I'm waking up with the sun shining in my eyes.

Except, this time, I'm not in some swanky hotel but tied up in a storage room staring up the skirt of Ashley Graham.

I grin. "You know, white really brings out your skin tone."

Her eyes widen and her face turns cherry red. "Pervert!" she shrieks and instantly pushes down on her green skirt. I tug at the rope binding my hands, testing their strength and wince as it cuts into my wrists. The knot is pretty tight and my arms are tingling painfully.

"A little help?" I ask.

Instead of leaping into action Ashley crosses her arms and frowns. "Who are you?" I would roll my eyes but it's a pretty legitimate question considering the circumstances. So, instead of taking offence at her lack of trust (which is pretty understandable) I answer with the most believable explanation.

"I'm here to rescue you." Okay, maybe its not the truth, but my wrists are killing me.

Her eyes light up and she smiles a brightly before she starts untying the rope."My father sent yout?"

"Of course. He's been out of his mind with worry."

"And Jarvis?" The question is innocent enough but judging by the way she's avoiding my eyes and her hands have slowed in working the knot there's something important about it. A security question, I realize, and purse my lips. Smart. Well, hell, what's the worst that could happen?

"He would be very worried," I say and watch as her eyes widen, "if he actually existed."

A moment of silence passes before she smiles, tears starting to gather in her eyes, and undoes the final knot. My freedom is short lived, however, as her arms wrap around my shoulders and Ashley buries her head in my neck, sobbing.

"I was so scared!" she cries. I gently pat her on the back and clear my throat. I'm not comfortable with crying girls because I don't know what the hell I'm supposed to do. Anger I could handle but crying? No way.

"It's okay," I mutter. "Everything will be okay."

I should know by now not to make promises I might not be able to keep.

* * *

After Ashley has practically drenched my shirt I start working on our escape. The room is pretty small and windowless with several shelving units and boxes lining the stone walls. The door is made of a thick wood and sturdy as hell. If I had my guns with me we'd have broken out in no time but seeing as I'm weaponless (fucking bastards) and the bobby pin in my hair was completely powerless against the ancient lock, I search the room for anything useful.

"How long have you been in here?" I ask Ashley who sits idly on a barrel.

"Just a few hours," she answers. "I'm never in the same place for long."

I rip open a box and frown at the handgun bullets inside. Moving on to another box, I ask, "How often do the guards check on you for bathroom breaks or food?"

"Usually every couple of hours; depending on where I am." She hovers behind me, peeking into another ammo filled box that I've just opened. "I'm always blind folded and carried so I don't really know where I am most of the time."

"So they're thorough," I mutter. "I was afraid of that." I give up searching the boxes and instead move toward the shelves.

"So what happened?" Ashley asks. "How did you get caught?"

"Isn't it obvious? So that I could find you." Not exactly true but it sounds pretty good.

"How did you know they wouldn't kill you? That's what I would've done." I raise an eyebrow at her. "I mean, you were looking for me so why not kill you and get rid of the threat? They had to have known who you were." Not if they were looking for a man but, then again, how much do they know about Leon? I remember that Ashley went missing almost a week ago because it was splashed all over the media and occurred a few days before Andrea and I received our mission. I don't know if demands were made as my interest in it died as soon as Andrea had plucked the newspaper from my hands.  
Now, though, I wish I had paid more attention.

"I try not to over think the little things," I answer but I'm wondering the same thing. Why would they keep me alive? If they really think I'm some sort of recovery agent (which they must be expecting as Ashley is the President's daughter and all) then they should have killed me like she said. Unless they're planning on asking for a higher ransom…

"I found something!" I glance at Ashley and grin widely when I see the crowbar in her hands. She hands it to me and I give her a thumbs up.

"Nice job! Now, let's get the hell outta Dodge."

It takes a few tries but with our combined strength we manage to break open the latch and smell sweet freedom. Which isn't exactly free.

"What the fuck?" Metal bars block the two hallways on either side of us and a waist high iron fence with spikes on the tips lie ahead. "Shit."

"What do we do now?" I motion her to be quiet and blow out a frustrated breath. Looking over the fence I see a chandelier in the middle of what looks to be a church. Several rows of wooden pews are about fifteen feet below along with an alter. Squinting, I can see a control panel to the right and in the opposite direction, above the alter, are several round circles. Looking beneath the control panel are three light scones.

"The control panel," I mutter. "I have to get over there." Ashley frowns and leans over the waist high gate.

"But how are you going to get over there?"

"By using the chandelier."

She crosses her arms and cocks her head, strands of blond falling over her shoulders. "And how are you going to do that? This fence is almost bigger than you are."

"Hey! That was completely uncalled for." I huff.

She just grins.

"But I'm glad you asked because you're going to help me." This time I'm the one grinning. Well, more like smirking.

Hands on hips Ashley says," I'm sorry but I don't think I can make you grow a foot in five minutes." My eye twitches.

"Well, that wasn't what I was going to ask but now that I know…" Who knew this Prez's daughter could be so witty? I don't know whether I should hit her or laugh. "Seeing as I still need you and you need me I'm not going to knock you out and pretend that what you said never happened." I tap the crowbar in my hands with just a hint of a threat in my eyes. "Now, let's listen to my brilliant plan shall we?" Ashley gulps and nods. "I thought so. Now, this is what I need you to do…"

After several minutes of convincing and (mostly) empty threats, Ashley is finally on her hands and knees.

"And Andrea said my skirt was short." I mutter.

"Well? What are you waiting for?" She snaps, obviously not pleased with her situation. No reason for her to be a bitch though.

"Get ready. On three. One… Two… Three!" Ashley squeezes her eyes shut and goes rigid while take four running steps and leap onto her back. She grunts underneath my weight but arches her back which sends me a good foot over the metal bars and towards the chandelier. I land with one foot on the chandelier, pain screaming up the left side of my body and automatically take another step as my body's inertia betrays me.

I fall forward, my knee banging against the edge as I go tumbling over. Someone is screaming I don't know who. It could be Ashley but then why does my throat suddenly hurt? I cover my face, expecting to land face first on the stone floor but instead get a shooting pain in my right ankle as I halt in my journey towards what would have been my death.

Familiar black dots swarm across my vision and I wonder if I'm going to faint again because, frankly, now would be a very bad time. But after taking a few seconds of deep breathing (more like gasping) everything comes into focus. I crane my neck up and see that my boot lace has caught on the chandelier. Great. The only thing keeping me from cracking my head open are the laces I bought at Wal-Mart. Awesome.

Apparently I'm not the only one who thinks so because I hear Ashley giggle from above me.

"I'm sorry!" she shouts. "But-But-" a giggle bursts from her lips. "I-I thought you were going to die!" Now she's laughing and I can honestly say that I'm a bit insulted. But as I glance up at my shoe laces my lips twitch and soon I'm laughing right along with her. "I-I was so scared!" she gasps and I can just imagine Ashley clutching at her sides. And then, like a fucking light switch, she starts sobbing again. Honestly, I'm starting to wonder if she's on her period or something. My laughter dies which just leaves Ashley's uncontrollable crying to echo in the empty church. Not exactly the most comfortable situation. But, then again, I am hanging onto life by my Wal-Mart shoe laces. Literally.

"Um, it's okay Ashley," I call out. Hey, it worked last time. "I'm fine. We're both fine. It's totally fine." She wails something I can't make out but maybe I don't want to know what she's saying in her hysteric state.

So, while Ashley is busy losing her grip on reality, I attempt to get myself back on track.

Ashley is relatively calm by the time I haul myself over the edge and manage to gain my footing on the chandelier. Now I know why Andrea does a million crunches everyday. Jesus. My stomach is killing me, my wrists hurt like hell, and both of my feet feel like they've been pulled out of their sockets and then shoved mercilessly back in.

And I still need to reach that damned control panel.

"Ashley, throw me the crowbar." Watery brown eyes stare into my own.

"What?"

"Throw. Me. The crowbar." She nods and gently tosses it into my hands. "Thanks."

I can feel her watching me undo my shoe laces and knot them together. "What're you doing?" she asks.

"I need to get to the control panel, remember? But I need to get the chandelier closer so I can make the jump. But," I wrap one end of the now three foot string around the crowbar. "I can't get the chandelier moving without some sort of-" I made a moving motion with my hand. "Hence this little invention." I gently swing the grapple in a slow circle, letting another inch loose as it gains momentum. Timing it just right I let it fly and watch as it clangs against the black fence. I grin as it catches and begin pulling myself forward.

I'm just a few feet away when the makeshift rope begins to get loose. I gain another few inches before the rope completely falls apart and the crowbar clatters to the floor but I've gained enough distance that the chandelier swings with ease.

When it heads towards my goal I ready myself to make the jump. It's a little unnerving but once my feet hit solid rock I can finally breath a sigh of relief. I bow as Ashley begins clapping and hurriedly re-tie my boots. That done, I make for the control panel.

It looks fairly simple and three lights (red, blue, green) shine brightly on the opposite wall. Each light is positioned so that when it hit's some sort of mangled picture is formed as the lights overlap each other. Shit. Another goddamn puzzle.

"The insignia!" Ashley shouts, pointing towards the lights. "You have to figure out how to make the insignia." I nod and get to work.

* * *

"No! The green one! Turn it to the left!"

Irritated, I turn and shout, "I already tried that!"

"No, you didn't!" We glared at each other. It had been almost ten minutes since I started messing with this stupid ass panel and I wasn't any closer to solving it then I was when I started. Correction, when 'we' started. Ashley hasn't shut up since I turned the damn thing on and has an opinion on every attempt I make. I start messing with the dials again, this time mimicking Ashley's annoying voice.

"'No, turn the red one to the right,'" I mock and spin the dial. "'No, the other right.'" I spin it again and-

"Holy shit." Surprisingly it was Ashley who says this as we both stare dumbly at the now completed puzzle. The metal gates raise up into the ceiling, out of view and Ashley wastes no time in making a beeline for me. We're both grinning like mad and I'm so fucking glad that its over that I hug her. She hugs me back and I quickly let go before things get awkward. "Let's go," I say and head for a ladder leading to the first floor.

As soon as her foot touches the floor the double doors burst open and in walks a completely drenched Leon with Andrea following a couple of steps behind.

Andrea looks around, dark eyes wild and dangerous. I take a step back, making sure to place Ashley between us as she finally spots us. I can practically feel Ashley stiffen as Andrea marches over and she doesn't look happy.

"You little bitch!" She shoves Ashley out of the way and I flinch as the blond lands hard on the floor. I open my mouth to say something, anything to try and defuse the situation but a sharp pain across my face sends my thoughts reeling. Andrea catches my shoulders in a death grip and shakes me once, twice hard before pulling me into a tight embrace. Now, I'm completely confused. What the fuck is going on?  
Andrea has never been much of a touchy feely person and this is one of the rare times that I've seen her practically explode with emotion. Even when her own mother practically disowned her she had just shrugged it off and said, "Good riddance."

"You weren't there when I woke up," she whispers. "I-I thought- Oh, God." Her body shakes with something dangerously close to a sob but when she pushes me away her eyes are clear, mouth firm. "Don't do that again. Ever." I nod, finally catching up with what must have happened when she woke up alone with no way to communicate with me as my radio had been taken along with my guns. "Who are you?" The question is directed at Ashley who is openly gaping.

"This is Ashley Graham, the President's daughter," I explain. Ashley nods and eyes Andrea with caution. "This," I say and motion towards a glaring Andrea, "is my partner, Andrea and that guy is Leon." Ashley stares star truck at Leon.

"Hi, Leon. Are you here to rescue me too?"

Leon raises an eyebrow. "Too?" he repeats. I clamp a hand over Ashley's mouth and start her towards the doors.

"Wow, will you look at that? We need to get going before whoever feeds her comes and-"

"I'll take the girl." All of us stare towards the alter or, more specifically, at the person standing in front of it. He's tall, well over six feet and is draped in a purple and gold robe with some weird stick in his hand.

Leon steps in front of us, obviously feeling the need to take whatever bullet he thinks must be heading towards us.

"Who are you?" he demands.

The man grins and says, "If you must know I am Osmund Saddler, the master of the fine religious community. " His voice is deep, almost soothing if he didn't look like something from the grave.

"What do you want?"

"To demonstrate to the whole world our astounding power of course!"

"Of course," I mutter. Saddler turns his gaze onto me and a genuine smile spreads across his face.

He points his weird stick at me and at once Leon and Andrea have their guns trained on him. "You, the President's daughter and the agent will have the honor of making my wonderful dream come true. No longer will the United States think they can police the world forever!" His gaze lands on Andrea as he openly runs them up and down her body.

"Oh, that's just nasty. Shoot the bitch!" I nudge Leon in the ribs but he doesn't budge and judging by the flush working up his neck he isn't exactly pleased that she got mentally raped either.

"Sadly," Saddler continues. "We were not able to include your beautiful friend here."

"Explain yourself!" Leon shouts and is it just me or did his voice get ten times deeper? Saddler smiles again and I'm seriously considering throwing up.

"When young Ashley returns she will not be alone. Oh, there's going to be one hell of a party when she returns to her loving father." Beneath Saddler's laugh, Ashley touches her neck and gasps.

"I think they shot something in my neck!"

"Yes, a little gift in the form of our power. You, my dear, will be the ultimate undoing of a country already on the verge of shambles. Your friends," he motioned towards Leon and myself, "are just in it for the ride." I felt along the skin of my own neck, felt a small scab just below my ear. I meet Andrea's worried gaze with one of my own.

"When I was unconscious," Leon mutters.

Grinning madly now, Saddler continues a speech he must have rehearsed in the mirror. "When the eggs hatch you will do as I say, I will have total control over your minds! The perfect way to promulgate one's religion, hm? But," he pauses. "Before that I thought I might bargain with the President for some donation. It takes quite a bit of money to keep this little church up and running."

"Faith and money will lead you no where, Saddler!" Jesus, Leon is on a roll! But then the wooden doors burst open again and Saddler's cavalry arrive with flaming bow guns. Seriously? In the corner of my eye I see Leon snatch Ashley's hand and make a run for it. Andrea and I follow suit just as the gunmen (bow gunmen?) let loose an array of arrows. Luck is on our side, however, and as far as I can tell we make it through without a scratch.

Leon races across the room, Ashley in tow, and jumps through a well placed window. The sound of glass shattering and Andrea firing off a round at our attacks pierce the air until all I can hear is the sound of rain as I leap through the window. We all land in a pile, my side connecting painfully with one of Leon's many fanny packs before rolling off of him. As Leon checks on Ashley Andrea tosses me a 9mm.

"I have a feeling you're gonna need it," she says. I nod and catch the end of Leon's conversation with Ashley.

"Don't worry; we got into this mess, we can get out of it." But, looking up at the darkened sky and feeling like a drowned rat, I wonder if Leon usually keeps his promises.


	7. Different Perspectives

**I don't own Resident Evil 4! **

_Author's Note: This chapter takes place before chapter 6. The point of view is through Andrea and Leon. _**  
**

After working with her partner for several years Andrea had thought that she'd have a better understanding of her by now. Funnily enough the only thing she knew for certain was that Francesca couldn't stay in one place if her life depended on it for more than five minutes. So it wasn't much of a surprise when Andrea woke up on the floor of an abandoned house, alone and with a note written in lipstick explaining Francesca's urge to explore. What did surprise her was the fact that the bruising on her side was almost completely numb and that her pack was set beside her.

The brunette shifted through the bag, taking note of anything missing (which was nothing), and tried to contact her partner.

"Copy Spirit Feather," she said softly while pressing a finger to her ear. When she got nothing but static back Andrea told herself not to panic and tried again. "Copy Spirit Feather. Where is your immediate location?" More silence. She cursed and ripped the ear piece from her ear. _Nothing wrong with it,_ she noted and put it back in. _Her ear piece must be damaged. Not surprising considering the circumstances. _Still, Andrea didn't like the fact that she didn't know where her partner or Leon was.

She gathered her gear and headed outside into the bright sunlight. She caught a bit of movement to her left and lifted her handgun to level with the man's head. His eyes were like liquid smoke and his voice rougher than any chainsmoker she had ever encountered.

"Welcome," he greeted. "I've got a selection of things that might interest ya." He pulled open the coat he wore to display a medley of weapons and health aid. Andrea lowered her gun and approached the strange man.

"The only thing I'm interested in is where my partner went." He let out a strangled laugh and let his coat fall closed.

"Information isn't free and neither are my protective services."

She frowned. "Protective services?"

He motioned toward the two dead bodies near a set of double doors. "The girl asked me to protect you. It's only fair that I receive payment for that protection."

"How much?" The man might have grinned, she wasn't sure as the scarf around his neck obscured her view of his mouth, but the price he named had her raising an eyebrow.

"That's quite a bit of money for just two bodies." She said icily.

"Considering the alternative I wouldn't complain."

"Fine." Andrea dug out the appropriate amount and deposited the coins into his eager hands. "Now, where did she go?"

"Only exit out of this place is through there." He pointed again to the doors. "Both of them went that way." Andrea nodded, having already come to that conclusion but glad to have it confirmed. She left through the door without a goodbye, eager to find her partner.

* * *

While Andrea was busy searching for her partner, Leon stood outside of a stone walled church and inspected the metal lock that kept him from entering. "Damnit," he cursed. The wood was too thick to break down even with the grenade strapped to his belt. The headache that plagued the back of his skull spiked as his radio signaled an incoming call. "Hunnigan," he greeted and did his best to smile. "The door is locked; I can't get in."

Hunnigan adjusted the glasses on her nose and said," Didn't they teach you how to pick locks at the academy?" The amusement in her voice and brown eyes was obvious. This time Leon's smile wasn't forced.

"There is some kind of weird insignia on it. I need to find a key."

"Then do it. Ashley is our first priority."

"There's something else." Leon paused as he tried to get his thoughts in order. "There are two other civilians with me, were with me," he corrected. "Something isn't right about them." Hunnigan frowned and turned face something off screen.

"What do you have?" Leon described the two women, giving Hunnigan their height, approximate weight and general description. "No last names?" she asked.

"No." She nodded.

"If anything pops I'll give you a ring. Are they a threat? You're hesitating." She commented. "If they are a threat to Ashley or the operation they must be dealt with."

Leon straightened his stance. "I don't believe they're a threat to the President's daughter. I'm not sure how to explain it. They seem to have knowledge of hand to hand combat and weapons training. They're looking for something," he admitted. "But they won't say what."

Hunnigan nodded and adjusted her glasses. "Well, your orders still stand. Retrieve the subject and eliminate _any _threats."

"Got it." Leon closed the line and hurried around the right side of the church. Whatever he needed to put inside of the indention had to be somewhere close by.

* * *

Meanwhile, Andrea carefully slid the book she had been reading back with the others. Her face was pale and the blood in her veins had turned to ice after the first page.

"Impossible," she muttered. "There's no way an organism can sync perfectly to the brain without serious side effects to the body." But all of it made sense. The chemical equations and long history of the Las Plagas was only a legend. Yet, there it was, staring her in the face from a dusty, leather bound book. She contemplated reading the others but backed away and continued throughout the rest of the two story house. Her mind, though, never left the images and information that she had just seen.

Andrea's family had a long history concerning science and medicine. Her mother had once been a well known and highly sought after scientist at one of the most prestigious labs in the U.S. Everyone had anticipated her daughter's entrance into a world were the betterment of mankind was always at stake.

_For three solid years I dedicated countless hours to my work, _she thought as she descended a staircase down to the main floor. _I'll never forget the look on her face when she found out what I did. When she found out I- _Andrea stopped at the puddle of blood on the ground and bent to examine it. The roaring of a chainsaw jerked her back up and it took a moment for her to process the fact that a man holding a very mean looking chainsaw was running at her as fast as he could.

She calculated her chance of escape versus her chance of a successful attack. She took aim at his legs and fired. As bullets tore through his flesh the man let loose a savage cry and went down on one knee. Andrea quickly aimed for the head and three more bullets made a home in his skull. Andrea let the spent magazine fall and quickly slid another in its place.

By the time she lifted the gun her enemy had gotten to his feet and was swinging his chainsaw wildly. She leaped back just as the hundreds of razor sharp teeth swung towards her and again as he followed with another wild swing but Andrea hadn't seen the fist sized rock beneath her feet until it was too late. Her foot stepped on it and she was sent falling back onto her butt. Every curse word she knew flew through her mind as the maniac approached at a break neck speed.

Luckily, though, his sluggish mind processed Andrea's fall moments after it happened and it took even longer for his reflexes to kick in so that when he was finally able to slow down he had already stumbled several feet passed her. Andrea took the opportunity to sweep her leg out and catch him around the ankles which caused him to fall to the ground directly on his own weapon. His mangled screams echoed through the forest and flecks of blood splattered across the shocked brunette's face as she watched him die.

Thoroughly shaken, Andrea got to her feet and stepped away from the bloody mess to take a few deep breaths. Once she regained her composure and her stomach stopped rolling, she grabbed the gun that had fallen during the struggle and started down a wide dirt path at a sprint.

* * *

Meanwhile, Leon was having a bit of trouble of his own. The blue eyed man grunted with annoyance and stabbed his finger at the object of his frustration. The last glowing blue light disappeared as the dial turned three times then stopped. The headache that had been pulsing at the back of his skull began to pound and his patience was wearing thin.

A green jewel taunted the ex-cop from beneath a metal cage that refused to open. Leon figured the jewel was the object he needed to fit into the church door and had spent more time than he cared to admit trying to get it free. He'd tried a number of combinations to get the damned thing loose and had re-read the riddle etched in stone numerous times which resulted in running back and forth between the cemetery and the area behind the church where the puzzle was located.

"Three, three, three, three, three… Four? Shit." Leon had thought that he'd never see another puzzle again after the Raccoon City incident. In Raccoon City, all he'd had to do was find a million keys or passwords while dodging slow moving zombies to get his ass out of the city before it blew up in a blaze of nuclear glory.

Now he had to rescue the President's daughter from some crazed cult, figure out puzzles that actually required some sort of thinking process and prevent himself from being killed from some backwater villagers he had never met before in his life! _And don't forget that goddamned boulder that came out of no where and almost smashed you flat._ He grimaced.

_All I wanted to do was make a difference_, he thought idly while randomly pressing the two buttons. _The Secret Service sounded so great when they recruited me. Exotic locales, undercover assignments, living life on the edge…_ Click. Leon blinked as the metal gates protected the green gem he sought after swung open and revealed the gleaming rock for him to take. Which he did with no time to spare, not trusting whatever fucktard who put it there to go 'gotcha!' and lock it back up forever.

A less manly (gayer) man would have shrieked with delight and done a little dance to celebrate but as Leon S. Kennedy was the man of all men (ahem) he only let out a quiet breath before heading back to the church doors.

_Author's Note: I decided to pick on Leon a bit in this chapter. I'm not sure why but I did. *grins* Oh, and the next chapter will be through the point of view of Andrea and Leon again. I just really wanted to get something posted ASAP so instead of one mega chapter it'll be two-ish. Hope you enjoyed and don't forget to comment! I'm not much of a mind reader so if you guys want something included or done send me a message! :D I'm always open to suggestions.  
_


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